My complaints about life may seem illogical and unreasonable.But I can't help it,I might be the reason but blaming a decision made @ 17,19,21 year old ( who was brutally sentenced by God to be cut out from her roots and be by herself) cannot be held as a reason for screwing up your entire life. I took a major decision that doesn't mean that life has come to an end.I want a chance to rethink and figure out to make it better place.Certainly you haven't made it better, infact you have made it worst.and somehow you made me look like a woman who loves money, complaints might have been monitory but the meaning behind it ,is not.I wish I could somehow make you understand.But it's hard.
I had given up the most precious thing in my life to move on.I had paid a huge cost and i do not want it to get wasted.Nothing is perfect in life I knew who exactly i was until the series of unforeseen situations had masked my intellect to even think, made me insecure and made me jump to conclusions and pushed me to take decisions.My decisions had been impuslive,emotionally driven and upto a certain extent selfish, but that's who I am.
My decisions have been directly or indirectly effected other people's life, those other people meant the world to me and yet i never realized that they did.It was my own insecurity which made me push myself to move on and that was the biggest mistake of my life.do I regret it..?? should I regret it..?? I don't know, I have no clue but what i have learnt in past couple of months is people who care for me have overcome my past which had tored their soul apart, but they are still with me and standing by my side for lifetime, that lifetime is undefined but having them in my life must be my driving force and it's time to embrace my imperfect life and bad decisons and horrible past and move on.I need to become that same old person who knew what exactl she wanted, who knew that no one could hurt her until unless she wanted them to.I was living in a shell and allowed people to hurt me , but not any more.
I had given up the most precious thing in my life to move on.I had paid a huge cost and i do not want it to get wasted.Nothing is perfect in life I knew who exactly i was until the series of unforeseen situations had masked my intellect to even think, made me insecure and made me jump to conclusions and pushed me to take decisions.My decisions had been impuslive,emotionally driven and upto a certain extent selfish, but that's who I am.
My decisions have been directly or indirectly effected other people's life, those other people meant the world to me and yet i never realized that they did.It was my own insecurity which made me push myself to move on and that was the biggest mistake of my life.do I regret it..?? should I regret it..?? I don't know, I have no clue but what i have learnt in past couple of months is people who care for me have overcome my past which had tored their soul apart, but they are still with me and standing by my side for lifetime, that lifetime is undefined but having them in my life must be my driving force and it's time to embrace my imperfect life and bad decisons and horrible past and move on.I need to become that same old person who knew what exactl she wanted, who knew that no one could hurt her until unless she wanted them to.I was living in a shell and allowed people to hurt me , but not any more.
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